There’s something to be said about keeping promises you made to yourself.
I don’t even remember what precipitated it, but three weeks ago I decided to attack Orange Theory head on after avoiding it ever since my brother went into the hospital in early August. At first, not going was a matter of scheduling and having places that I needed (and wanted) to be, and then it turned into a matter of me not wanting to go.
Like a toddler having a tantrum. I DON’T WANNA!!!
But then I think I just kind of got fed up with myself and my attitude. Maybe I could wax poetic about not wanting it to feel like life was simply moving on after Jim’s death, but that would be a lie. It was all about me not wanting to work hard, me not wanting to push myself, me not wanting to be uncomfortable. I was numbing myself with TV and endless computer scrolling and it was working quite well for me, thankyouverymuch.
Turns out, even I got sick of myself. And so I scheduled two full weeks. Every weekday, two weeks in a row. I ended up modifying a little bit, because, HA – I’m old. But, I did what I set out to do. My muscles hurt and my mind is happy.
But more than that, I’m proud of myself. I’m not always known for following through on stuff like this and this time I did. Now Laura really came through for Future Laura.
Right now I’m scheduled out for the next two weeks as well and I’m almost looking forward to it. I can say this with all honesty: I’m totally looking forward to being proud of myself.
So, there’s that.